Sometimes the First Book is HARD to Write!

I don’t pretend to know everything there is to know about writing, editing, all that wonderful stuff. It’s enough to make me want to pull my hair out some days. It’s frustrating on a level that makes me question if I’m somewhat insane. Then again, I think many writers are to an extent. Why else would we spend hours and hours typing and dreaming and typing some more, just to go back and delete half of what we wrote?

The frustration is real.

For me though, who has never thought seriously about writing except as a hobby till recently, it makes me ponder a lot.

I’ve written on and off for the last 33 years starting when I was around 14. It began as an escape, an outlet for a very dark place in my life. I would escape into imaginary worlds and live out this alternate life where magic was real and only my imagination was my limits. This, eventually, turned into a form of writing, jotting down scenes and chapters of stories I would never finish. But I didn’t care. It was a hobby, a way to escape the real world.

I’ve told this before but bares repeating a little. Those half-finished stories became the basis of what I’m writing now. Six different stories, 6 different maps, all having their own small pieces of history, culminated into a backstory for a passion I love, writing an epic story.

How has it worked out so far?

Do I really have to answer that question?

The simple answer is, it’s absolutely frustrating!

The longer answer isn’t so easy.

See, I have the outline already. In fact, the first book is technically done. It just needs editing. Which then leads to rewrites, changing scenes, making new chapters because I can’t stand how simple some things are. They need to have more problems to face. The world needs to be expanded.

You know how it goes. Once you revisit the story you thought was finished, you cringe and go, “I wrote that??” So you set out to rewrite.

My issue was, I don’t do things in an orderly manner. I know, I’m bad. I finished the first book and started on the second. The truth is, I already wrote the rough draft for 4 books. They’ve been sitting around for years as I procrastinate.

So the first book was finished, I started on editing the second when I realized I needed to change a massive amount of the second book. I begin to and four chapters in, I’m reading through it and I’m in love. I mean, this is great stuff! I look back at my first book and start cringing again.

The two books seem to be from two different genres. The first book starts out as a major introduction to a huge world with history and characters. However, it doesn’t have that feel of intimate character interaction or the feel the second book already has. The stakes are massively higher. The imbalance between the two books are real.

I feel dread come over me because I feel I just wasted a major portion of a year.

I take a step back and evaluate the problem from a distance. I’m sick of editing that first book with a passion. I want it done. I want to hate the thing! But of course, I can’t do that.

The next step is logically, do something else.

I do exactly that. I write another story!

Lucky for me and everyone else, the story is in the universe I created. It takes place 300 years before the events of the first book. I mean for it to be short, an introduction to the world… And I wind up writing a lot more than intended.

Plus, it’s dark. I mean, it’s a whole different genre on a different world. The differences are night and day. BUT, they connect. They connect so well in fact, i realize when I’m finishing the story, I now have to go back to the first book and rewrite a few chapters! WHAT?? Does this never end?!

So began another round of staring at the FIRST BOOK. That’s where I am right now.

I’ll be honest. It’s going good. The feeling of it being more relatable to book 2 is telling. I am having to add several more chapters but trust me, using the prequel as a reference, the characters and things happening fit perfect as a setup for book 2.

I’m just hating that it’s taken this long to finish ONE book. How does anyone with a family write?

Rambling aside, I can tell this book is going to be epic and the sequel and what follows will be cosmic in scope. I’m introducing a story that spans multiple worlds, including Earth, the Fae, Scifi elements, a system the worlds live in (the reason why you see “Extal” mentioned in my world builder app). It’s happening - slowly.

Now, if i can ditch facebook, stay away from youtube, stay away from the internet and write…

That’s the life for me.